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22 06, 2015

Does Motivation Have Anything to do With Success?

By |2017-03-03T12:06:52-05:00June 22nd, 2015|Categories: Blog, Motivation, Success|Tags: , , , , , |Comments Off on Does Motivation Have Anything to do With Success?

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HardWork_MotivationMatrix

Motivational Matrix, Dr. Jim Taylor

People talk about ‘getting motivated’ but how does that relate to their success?  I always thought that motivation was the key to success but now I’m not sure. I think the equation is much more complicated. Motivation is only a small part of being successful.  Have you ever said, “I feel really motivated to get some work done,” and then gone to take a nap?

Motivation or the desire to get things done is one of the first steps to success. The bottom line is it takes hard work to get it done. I’m not talking about the work that you do every day, i.e. going to your job,  putting gas in your car,   and cleaning the house, etc. I’m talking about what you do after that stuff is done. Success will come when you’re focusing on that special dream or goal. It could be losing weight or getting fit. They require your ability to ‘get it done’ no matter how you’re feeling.

Writing for Psychology Today, Dr. Jim Taylor defines motivation as “being able to work hard in the face of obstacles, boredom, fatigue, stress, and the desire to do other things.” Each person has a different motivation that drives them toward success. Dr. Taylor illustrates this with the motivation matrix, which breaks down motivation along two dimensions: external vs. internal and negative vs. positive. Each combination—internal-positive, external-positive, internal-negative and external-negative—can provide sufficient motivation to net you success.

The carrot or the stick?

The carrot or the stick?

Does your style of motivation work?

Will it give you the drive, planning skills and sacrifice you will need to stay the course?

Will it give you the ability to work when you’re sick?

What about turning off the Golf Channel?

Are you able to say no to a party invitation because your ‘work of success’ isn’t finished?

What will you say to your friends when the call you a ‘workaholic?’

Can you sacrifice that special brownie your girlfriend made so you can stay on your diet?

Does giving up one day mean giving up forever?

Confronting the obstacles before you get started is one way to help keep you on track. We’ve all fallen off the ‘success wagon’ but the smart ones get right back up.

 

Lisbeth has been teaching businesses how to improve their customer service and the customer experience for over 20 years. To schedule a consultation or have her speak at your business, reach her at [email protected] If she’s not in her office, she can often be found mornings at the YMCA in East Greenbush, New York. 

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20 06, 2014

Want to be Successful? You’ll have to do your own Pushups

By |2017-03-03T12:06:55-05:00June 20th, 2014|Categories: Blog, Success|Tags: , , , |Comments Off on Want to be Successful? You’ll have to do your own Pushups

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“You can’t hire someone else to do your push-ups for you.” Amen. Like your physical training program, you must take responsibility for your own mentoring program if you expect to gain anything from it.

Nobody wants to hear this but becoming a success takes work—lots of it. It also takes a lot of follow through which most people don’t like to hear either. If you pay attention to both, it’s likely you will be able to accomplish what you want.

These are really simple rules, so why don’t we “just do it?”

Many people talk about being rich but when you look at what they’re doing, you know it won’t make them any money. Most likely, they know that too. To get rich you have to invest your money before you spend it.  According to what I’ve read, most people have habits that cause them to fail financially. My mom used to say it’s a simple formula: you need to spend less than you make. Then you will have some left over to invest. I know this is a tough one; there are so many things to spend your money on with new things coming out every day.

If you want to be successful, you will have to spend lots of extra hours working at your trade. You need to ask yourself, do I have the gumption to keep at it and give up other things? It seems that both success and financial freedom require giving up something in the present to get what you want in the future. You will have to endure names like “workaholic, cheapskate and other unflattering descriptions. You must be willing to take consistent action and get out of your comfort zone. Dreaming will not get you much except maybe a good night’s sleep. You must take your dreams and turn them into actionable items.

I was listening to a friend of mine talk about her illnesses; most of which are fictional. Yes, she has a bad back but who doesn’t? She has been told to take Yoga and water aerobics to stretch her tight muscles.  She continues to go from doctor to doctor to get some sympathy and the magic pill. Why doesn’t she just do the work? She won’t because effort is out of her comfort zone. Her middle name should be “the easy way out.”

We’re all guilty of looking for short cuts. I have a friend who won’t train his dog to learn simple commands. He doesn’t care if the dog jumps on you, nips at your hand (he taught the dog to play rough) or doesn’t come when his name is called. (Of course he doesn’t know his name, why should he come?).  His owner is unwilling to do the work to socialize or make his dog successful.   Maybe it sounds silly when I say “successful” when talking about the dog, but he needs certain skills to live in society. One wrong move and he will be back in a shelter and considered not adoptable.

If you want results, you will have to take action. You can’t let things happen to you or say, “I’m not lucky.”

The sad thing about all of this is that we are all destined to become successful but only a small portion of us will make it.

Some of you are cuter, richer and smarter but not of this guarantees success.

You need to do the right things to get the results you’re after. How will you find out what you should be doing? The best thing is to learn from someone who is successful. Once you know how they did it, just apply the same strategies. At l least, it will put you on the right road. You may not get it exact the first time, but few successful people do. Just get a plan and keep at it.

I hate the expression “no pain, no gain” but it’s probably so. Be willing to sacrifice and you will get the rewards.

And like I said, you’ll have to do your own pushups.

Lisbeth Calandrino has been doing training and  mentoring for over 30 years. Join her in Panama City, FL for two days of workshops: sign up at http://www.mohawkuniversity.com/2DayPanamaCitySeminar2014.aspx

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29 09, 2013

Success Happens One Bite At A Time

By |2017-03-03T12:07:00-05:00September 29th, 2013|Categories: Blog, Success|Tags: , , , |Comments Off on Success Happens One Bite At A Time

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One bite at a time.

I recently joined Weight Watchers. Those of you that know me are laughing—where is the weight? Well, I’ve put on 5 pounds and when you’re 4’11” every  ounce makes a difference. I figured, why not; I’ll learn something and lose the weight. I enlisted my running pal Molly, who also attends. (I don’t know why she goes , but she says she’s over her legal weight limit too!)

It was a very big group, and no one laughed when I got on the scale. “I said I’m here to get rid of those 5 pounds before they turn into 20.”

“Good idea said the woman behind the counter.” I knew this was serious.

I have always been weight conscious since my beloved grandmother died weighing well over 200 pounds, and she was also 4’11” tall. She used to treat me to hot fudge sundaes after we went to the movies. I remember she used to get on the scale and weigh herself. I asked her what she was doing, (I was too short to see the numbers.) She kindly said, “It’s none of your business.” That was Grandma Christina; always nice to me unless I mentioned her weight.

The history of Weight Watchers goes back to Jean Nidetch, a 41-year-old 214 housewife who decided to start her own support groups.

 

In 1963, Weight Watchers incorporated and had their first public meeting in Queens. There were 50 people standing in the wings because Jean had only rented 40 chairs! In 1978, it was sold to HJ Heinz and has continued to support health initiatives in this country.

The cheerful group leader was an 85-year-old dynamo that had lost 150 pounds 20 years ago. Actually, she was more like a drill sergeant; I liked her immediately. I thought, what a great job; helping people succeed.

After some niceties, the meeting began.

The first question was, why should we journal our food intake? She liked my answer, “It shows accountability; I yelled.”

You know I was always one of those kids who needed to be first and yell out the answers, and this was the place to do it. The takeaways were right on target. If you need some “pumping up” check yourself into Weight Watchers.

  1. You didn’t get fat in one day so don’t expect to get thin in one day. I love this! I would say, success is a process not an event so stay with it.
  2. If you fall off the wagon, get back on. One day off won’t kill you. I love the expression: Neither success nor failure is permanent. How much you can eat is determined by how much you weigh and is on a point system. They give you extra points weekly in case you fall off the wagon!
  3. Hold yourself responsible and keep track of your goals. Holding yourself accountable,  means you’re serious; if you want it, make it happen.
  4. Remind yourself of what you have done, not what you haven’t done. Making yourself a victim never helps other than to provide an excuse for yourself.

 

I couldn’t eat all my food points—you are told that you must. I was also told I probably not eating enough of the right foods and then overeating. (In my case, treating vegetables as my major food group.) Vegetables are free, eat as much as you like, but you need other foods other than pasta.

Not hungry yet and I had corn-on-the Cobb and olives with  my oatmeal this morning. So far, so good.

 

Rome also wasn’t built in a day either.

 

Lisbeth Calandrino helps businesses build loyal relationships with their customers through customer service and powerful communication training. To hire Lisbeth for your next event, she can be reached at [email protected]

 

 

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21 10, 2012

Does Change Have To Be An Uphill Battle?

By |2017-03-03T12:07:03-05:00October 21st, 2012|Categories: Blog, Change|Tags: , , , , , , , |2 Comments

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Change doesn’t have to be an uphill battle.

I was speaking at an event for Crossville Inc. last week; it was entitled, Successful Showroom Selling.    It’s a four-day event, includes a manufacturing tour, new-product introductions and various seminars.

I was speaking on ‘How to Use Social Media to Create Traffic in Your Show Room’.

It occurred to me the ideas weren’t complicated in fact the ideas were fun. What would make it complicated was people’s resistance to change and trying something new.

Are  changes that difficult? If you said to a business owner,  do you want to be successful they would  say yes. If in the next breath you mention social media, there would be plenty of frowns.

What do people have to do to get past the ‘change’ part?

There are so many people who are resistant to social media; they say it’s stupid, intrusive and only for young people.  These are the same people who don’t  mind going out,  getting completely intoxicated and bragging about it.

Success is all about the ability to change. It appears that some people think if they learn something new, it means what they knew before was inadequate or wrong. Nothing could be further from the truth. Prior successes won’t guarantee success in the future, but it does show that you have some good skills.

Somewhere I heard the term ‘conscious intention’; it’s the thought that our success and failure depend on our responsive ability to determine what we want and then work towards it. If you ask business owners if they want more store traffic they would also say yes. If you suggest they use social media,  they look at you suspiciously.

I didn’t ask them to rob a bank. I just asked them to try something different.

Why wait until your business is falling apart, your relationship is in the dumper, or  you’re on the verge of financial ruin to make changes in your life?

Do we all need setbacks to move forward?

I went to a wonderful cocktail party last night hosted by my friends Joanne and Bruce.

Joanne invited the owner of her gym, Brian Hull and trainer, Marcus McGregor.  (By the way, the gym is called Recenter Square and is on 319 Hamilton Street.)

I must admit even for a gym junkie like myself these two looked amazing and intimidating.

At one point Joanne announced her abs were brought to us by her trainer. It was a very nice tribute but the tribute  really goes to Joanne and her persistence.  All of us who go to the gym know ‘it isn’t easy’.

But  Joanne is an amazing business woman and of course is applying good business skills to skills to improve her abs.

Even if you’re in a rut and not living the life you want you are capable of making changes. Sometimes all that’s needed is baby steps forward, and suddenly you’re on the path to change. Maybe it’s eating half of what’s on your plate to begin to lose weight.

All of us have the conscious capacity to work towards what we want. We can  tell ourselves we want to be better but ‘telling’ is not ‘doing’.

Successes from the past don’t guarantee success  in the future, but they show us that we have the capability to succeed.

Why wouldn’t these skills carry over to our brand-new tasks? Everything we’ve learned supports our ability to learn something fresh and take us to the next level. When you were young learning to drive a car was really scary until you realized that you had all the skills to do it. You just need to practice.

What can you do to help move forward?

Say good things about yourself—instead of ‘boy am I stupid.’ Your mind remembers what you say about it so be kind.

Get the baby steps down and then add a few bigger ones. Remember nobody is really looking at you expect you.

Once you get it down, amp it up! A friend of mine he didn’t think he could lose more weight because he would be the same weight he was when he was in high school. I don’t know what that means. I had another friend who was upset because she could fit into her prom dress! I don’t get this.

Seek out people who are succeeding in your task. Tell them how great they look, ask them how they’ve done it and join them in their success.

Do one thing at a time. Don’t do too many things at once.

Reward yourself for your successes. You deserve it.

They say Rome wasn’t built in a day; neither will your abs.

I love this quote from George Bernard Shaw; the reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to him. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man.

Lisbeth helps businesses build loyal relationships with their customers. She does this through customer service and communication training. She can be reached at [email protected]

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